What time is it?
There is this certain little, special thing about living in Smalltownland. A certain something that affects every millisecond of our days here. Smalltownland actually sits right next to the time line that divides the central and eastern time zones. Now, I know what you are thinking. If Smalltownland sits inside the central time zone then, what's the big deal?
So, the people of Smalltownland have devised a few vocabulary terms to solve this problem.
Slow time - the time on your clock if you live in the central time zone.
Fast time - the time on your clock if you live in the eastern time zone.
County time - this also means central time or slow time
Thus, if you write out your daughter's birthday party invitations you must specify "fast time" or "slow time". If you make an appointment at your local hair salon you need to ask, "fast time" or "slow time". Because, living in the central time zone does not, in any way, automatically mean that you observe central time.
If you are not totally confused, we actually have some people in our county who do not change their clocks in the fall or spring. So, in actuality they observe central time for part of the year and eastern time for the other part of the year. I find that so confusing it makes my brain hurt.