Tuesday, August 23, 2011

I Say Fast Time, You Say Slow Time....Let's Call the Whole Thing Off

Once upon a time, long ago in blog land, when I first started this endeavor I mentioned that I live near the central/eastern time line.  This may seem like a trivial notion to some of you out there, until you know just how we folks around here deal with this situation. 


First, let's clarify the vocabulary.  Around these parts we have fast time and slow time.  Colloquial terms for certain, but if you want to function in Smalltownland these words are vital to your existence.  Fast time is the local speak for eastern time and slow time is known as central time.  This is all well and good until you realize that about half of our county population lives in the slow time zone and works in the fast time zone.  
This means you have to make a CHOICE about what time you want to use in your daily life.  Confused yet?  Just you wait!  


All of the aforementioned language is relevant to the fact that some churches, and a few businesses, choose not to change their clocks when we all spring forward and fall back.  Yes....that's right.......half of the year they are on slow time and the other half they are on fast time.  If you are still confused, please review the vocabulary in the previous paragraph. 


Thus, when you make a doctor's appointment, or anything else as such, you must clarify the time as being fast or slow.  Please don't even utilize the words, eastern or central.  There are folks around here who won't even know what you are talking about.  I learned that lesson when I first moved here....fast and slow are the correct words no matter how strange you think they are. 

I have a friend who, when she visits her parent's home here in Smalltownland, watches her cell phone time change as she walks into a different room in their house.
As for me?  Well, I work in the central/slow time zone.  But, Secret Agent Man works in the eastern/fast time zone.  Typically our household clocks are set to eastern/fast time.  

Perpetual confusion will keep you on your toes.......


45 comments:

  1. Absolutely funny post! I can barely imagine to have rooms in different time zones... I am sure this makes for a few very good anecdotes!

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  2. That is amazing! I had never given this topic any thought but I can sure see how confusing it would be! Thanks for such a well written desciption.

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  3. REALLY!???? Oh my! I would be so confused! It is kinda entertaining too!

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  4. Aye yie yie - that would drive me crazy(ier) . . .

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  5. my big sis in the Upper Peninsula, MI lives in one time zone and works in another also. i think i'd have to move... :)

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  6. Verrry interesting! I have never heard about this, I think there is a part of my birth state of Oregon that is in the Mountain zone...wonder if they have that going on there?

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  7. I have never heard the terms slow time and fast times..How interesting...this sounds difficult to me...but, I guess you get use to it. So, if you and your husband are going to have a lunch date...what it the time of your date??
    good post.
    shug

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  8. This drives me crazy!! I think we should lobby for the entire state to be in the same time zone.

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  9. Now that is something I have never thought of...jeez life can be so complicated...I don't dare think about my hubby and I in different time zones!!!!
    P.S. Love that first picture of the house on the curve....

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  10. My goodness, that's hilarious! I can't imagine going from one zone to another like that. We change times, but - like (some of) you - we Spring forward and Fall back.... but we ALL do it!
    That's so funny...

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  11. Crazy!! It must take some getting used too...I love the language back there...wonderful!

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  12. Oh my-I have enough trouble keeping up with the time without that~

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  13. Shug - I use fast time around our house and for "dates" with the hubs. However, as soon as I hit the door for work I am on slow time in the mind. Crazy!

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  14. Ribbons - Wouldn't it be great if we were all on the same time? No confusion.

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  15. And I thought Daylight Savings Time was confusing. Yikes.

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  16. Well, I learned some really new things today from reading your post! First, I had never heard a bit of Oregon was in a different time zone so I googled and and it's TRUE! And then I noticed how goofy the dividing lines are and how many states have dual time zones.. the craziest is MI!

    You have my sympathies. Teresa :-)

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  17. Oh my goodness! I've never heard of fast and slow time! Hilarious!

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  18. Weird, in a humorous kind of way!

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  19. I never thought about how it would feel to live near a time zone and now I can see how it can cause confusions! I guess the solution is to be flexible about time.

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  20. Farmchick -- now that is confusing. But for the "johnny come lately" folks they will always have a good excuse using the various time zones. -- barbara

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  21. That is really confusing ... but the cell phone helps ! interesting stuff!

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  22. I had a hard time with the time change from Arizona to here. I don't think I could do what you do.

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  23. I've known it for a while now, but this post confirms what I know to be true. You're a better woman than me!

    I'm afraid the whole time thing would put me right over the edge. It doesn't help that I have certain deficiencies when it comes to handling time. I find it elusive and my inadequacies are frequently revealed!

    Love the photography that accompanies your enlightening post. :) You have a wealth of beautiful old barns and homes!

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  24. I never could understand the whole damn thing! Sunlight is sunlight and there is only so much of it in a day, be in summer or winter. So, if they say that they do it because of commuting or whatever, that doesn't make any sense. We all have lights now to turn on, either in the morning if it is dark or the evening if it is dark. Does it make any sense to you? We should all just do what Arizona does...nothing! The clocks never change. Maybe that is why there are so many retirees there. They don't want to stress about time so they move to Arizona where they gain more time, hence stay younger. Smart!!

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  25. I can totally see that! My planner would have to be dotted with f.t. and s.t. behind every entry or I'd get lost.

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  26. Amen Sister! We live on fast time, but go ten miles west to Illinois, or ten miles north to Newton County, and you are on slow time! We can thank our lovely governor for this mess. Most of Indiana never changed time, which meant that for half the year we were all on the same time. I'm sure if you lined us up on the good ol' USA map, we are west of you and still on EST. I'm sorry, but when the sun is lighting up the face of Miss Liberty in NYC, we are NOT seeing it. I want my "slow time" back for the summer!

    I am now going to step off my soap box, but I reserve the right to get back on it later! ;-)

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  27. Hilarious! Always wondered for the life of me--- why do states even THINK of splitting time zones? Sheeeeeesh!

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  28. This is fantastic little funny tidbit that I would have never known. You might remember living in North Dakota that we have some similar areas with central and mountain time. I think central time is slow time! Love it.

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  29. Good grief! That is confusing! Don't know if I'd ever "get it"! haha!

    Of course, you could always use it as a good excuse to be late - "Oh, sorry, I was on slow time!"

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  30. wow that would drive me crazy...I would be confused all the time...

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  31. Oh my goodness! That would drive me nuts and probably to drink, or move...

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  32. That is really fascinating to me! I've been on central my whole life until now. It as really hard for me to adjust to, considering that now SNL comes on at 11:30 instead of 10:30. I mean, how am I to get used to that?! I can't even imagine how you get used to always switching back and forth!

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  33. When I was on a USAF missile crew everything we did in the ICBM control center was on Greenwich Mean Time, commonly known as Zulu. Rather than having to convert Local time to Zulu most crew members wore two wrist watches, one on one wrist set to Local and one on the other set to Zulu. Used to drive my first wife nuts when she wondered what time it was and looked at the wrong watch.

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  34. I am confused just reading about fast and slow time. I can only imagine how confused you get living in the middle of the zones.
    It sure made for a good post though. I'll have to ask my KY aunt about fast and slow time.

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  35. I'm only familiar with this when I fly from UK to Europe losing an hour going and gaining one coming back ... something not right there !!
    Live slow and work fast ... love it. I want my time outside of work to go slow and in work to go fast !!

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  36. Funny and interesting. Well written!!

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  37. Very confusing. I am glad we don't have that problem.

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  38. If you lived in Arizona you would always be on the same time. Funny out here we don't do daylight savings... so we tell people that we change time zones instead :)

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  39. Oh my gosh, how do you do it! I'm pretty sure that would drive me nuts!

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  40. I'm always late. I think if I lived there, I would always be really, really late! : )

    ~Andrea

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  41. Oh my!!! My head is spinning just from reading this post. Glad y'all can keep it straight.

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